Tim Burton, Michael Keaton, and Michelle Pfeiffer deliver better than Santa could ever.
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Superhero movies never got hotter; neither did Christmas.
Credit: Zade Rosenthal / Warner Bros / DC Comics / Kobal / Shutterstock
Welcome to Thanks, I Love It, our series highlighting something onscreen we’re obsessed with this week.
Long before there was the MCU vs. the DCEU, superhero movies were so fitfully made you wouldn’t dare call them a genre at all. A Superman here (1978), a Batman there (1989) — Spider-Man wouldn’t come until the next century had dawned. But into this dearth of superpowered spectacle came a film so singular that it’s not only my favorite superhero movie, not only my favorite Batman movie, but also my all-time favorite holiday movie. Of course, I speak of the cinematic wonder that was 1992’s Batman Returns.
Hot off the success of Batman, director Tim Burton and his leading man Michael Keaton reteamed for a sequel that made Gotham more gothic, made Batman more likely to kill rampaging clowns in the street, and made the sexiest Christmas movie ever to light up the silver screen.Â
It all began with a story of bat meets girl.
Sullen but smoldering billionaire bachelor Bruce Wayne (Keaton) is smarting off the (predictable) end of his romance with photojournalist Vicki Vale. Frazzled but determined secretary — pardon me — executive assistant Selina Kyle (Michelle Pfeiffer) is fresh off being tossed off a skyscraper by her merciless industrialist boss (Christopher Walken). Their meet-cute arrives in an uncomfortable office encounter, which involves some blatant lies, a tale of a day without panties, and a none-too-subtle clue that Selena is not to be toyed with. Still, sparks fly as snow falls outside.
His stare, which was cold moments before as he discussed business and corruption, is now alight in awe of this smirking smoke show before him. Unbeknownst to her, they’d met before her post-brush-with-death glow-up. But Bruce was unrecognizable in the batsuit. Besides, she’s a new (cat)woman now. When she dons a skintight super-suit of her own, things only get hotter.
Catwoman and her kinky, sexy, cool costume are timelessly alluring.
Selina’s makeover scene as she transforms into her supervillainess persona Catwoman is iconic for its ferocious fashioning of her Frankenstein-stitched suit and her demolition of the pretty pink accoutrement in her cramped, girly apartment. When she ascends reborn — high-heeled, red-lipped, and ready to tear to shreds any fool who crosses her — she is a vision of female rage and an intoxicating power fantasy, all wrapped up in a glossy black bodice.
For a baby bi like me, it was impossible to know what a formative moment it would be as I watched Catwoman in all her DIY-catsuit glory battling with Batman on a rooftop. » …
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